Wide eyed and legless

This story was inspired by a post in a newspaper, and a challenge from a fellow writer to tell the story behind it.  'Reveller leaves false leg outside Doncaster pub.' Wide eyed and legless. At first it had been a steep learning curve to try to blend in without being noticed. That had been the …

The Villian

What do you think? Was the punishment sufficient or will he re-offend? People of a certain disposition will understand the importance of this crime.   I am so ashamed. My solicitor advised me to plead temporary insanity and for a while I was tempted. A long day and being tired was no excuse. I knew …

Robot

I was trying to concentrate on proof reading my next book today when I was interrupted. At least it provided inspiration for this Drabble. (A short story of 100 words exactly.)   Definition of a Robot 'A person who works mechanically without original thought, especially one who responds  automatically to the commands of others.'   I love being a robot. Ring, ring. Pick up the phone, but say nothing. Silence, …

Missing

I think a lot of people will be able to relate to this one.  😀  Everyone has someone and I had my partner. We went everywhere together and were a perfect match. That is until the lady of the house went away for a few days, and left the family to look after us. At …

UnSantaciding

Poor Old Santa seems to have had a hard time of it lately. Some friends in a writer's group seem determined to make his life difficult, and I didn't help with my Zombie Christmas story. His problems included missing stockings, no Christmas tree, the cupboard under the stairs and using Trip Advisor, hence the odd …

Zombie fig rolls

Chatting with some friends about Advent calendars and Christmas, we got onto the subject of fig rolls and zombies (as you do).   It was such a weird combination it tickled my quirky nature and this was the result.  It wasn’t fun being one of the undead. Since I’d been killed in a robbery gone wrong …

Red Moon

It was one of those 'seemed a good idea at the time' moments. Maybe I was a vampire in a previous life, but I had always found it easier to write my books and stories in the early hours. Normally this wasn't a problem, but with my book release imminent, a book signing arranged for …

Mugs on Saturday night

A friend in Canada sent me an e-mail with a series of decorative mugs. I couldn't resist sharing this one with The Bookshop Cafe, one of my online readers/writers groups. Well it is Saturday night in the UK. Cheers! 

The Rectum

I know this is an oldie, but it makes a lot of sense, and it is funny. All the organs of the body had a meeting to decide who should be in charge. 'I should be in charge,' said the brain, 'because I run all the body's systems, so without me nothing would happen.' 'I …

How much?

In response to The Daily Post's writing prompt: "Retrospectively Funny." A few years ago we were in a dimly lit cafe in the very early hours of the morning after a night on the razz. My friend peered at the bill but was too squiffy to read it properly, so I went to settle up. …